Back in the old Soviet days the latest governmental edict from the authoritarian Leftist commies would be met with a roll of the eyes and a shrug of the shoulders. The proletariat would then repair to their cement hovels, break the rules, and pray their neighbors wouldn’t inform on them. If a neighbor dropped a dime it could mean a visit from the secret police and fewer bread rations.
Welcome to the gulag that is coronavirus California in 2020!
After canceling Halloween, Governor Gavin Newsom issued his government edicts for the Thanksgiving table and, though this is hard to believe, they’re dumber than demanding people wear masks on the open beach in 80º weather. They’re so ridiculous that even mask-woke Hollywood leftists, who speak fluent dumb, are probably wondering about them.
“Vernon Dursley” Newsom is now banishing the proletariat to Thanksgiving solitude, making no noise in our cupboards under the stairs.
OK, that’s not entirely true. The governor is giving you permission to have some guests for Thanksgiving. Outside. Wearing a mask. Without exertion.
Californians may not celebrate Thanksgiving inside. Their dinners must be held outside with at “least three sides of the space (or 75%) … open to the outdoors.” Guests, who are required to wear masks, are also required to be kept six feet apart if they take them off. That’s going to have to be a gigantic table. Guests from more than three families “are prohibited.”
Those who pass the test may stay for only two hours. They shall not sing.
They may be able to use the restroom but only if the host cleans it often on Thanksgiving.
Californians may not exert themselves. Such a dictate could only come from a man who’s never actually pulled off a Thanksgiving meal. Toss out the annual turkey trot, too.
The guidelines come as Gov. Newsom reports that COVID cases and hospitalizations in California are trending up “slightly” and the 7-day positivity rate is also experiencing “modest” increases.