You’ve lost your job, you don’t know how you’re going to put food on the table to feed your children much less put a roof over your head. You’re afraid to bring them outside for fear of them catching a contagious virus. Things are just looking dark.
But then you see a video of Will Farrell and Sarah Silverman singing John Lennon’s “Imagine” to you, all your troubles just go away. Sure, you may be on your death bed listening to a bunch of millionaires tell you that there’s no Heaven to go to once you die, but don’t you just feel good? You might be a single mother crying quietly to herself in the dark after she puts the kids to sleep, worried about their future, but Ellen just posted a video of herself in her mansion commenting about how she feels like she’s in jail. It’s like you’re right there commiserating with her!
If you’ve wanted to thank these celebrities for their amazing work complaining and preaching to you during this trying time, then don’t worry, that video has already been made and all you have to do is spread it around to truly show your gratitude.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m sure celebs are just as fed up with the pandemic as we are and we can sympathize together with that sentiment in mind. It’s just that Madonna naked in a bath that was likely prepared for her telling us that the coronavirus doesn’t care if your rich or poor doesn’t exactly make the crushing depression after watching your business go under just disappear. We’re just watching you tell us stuff we already know from the safety and comfort of your very large house you were able to afford thanks to your very large bank account that won’t be depleting any time soon.
So thanks, celebrities…for absolutely nothing…
…except Andrew Lloyd Webber, Patrick Stewart, John Krasinski, and anyone else who actually put their talents to good use. Also, Ryan Reynolds for reminding us that even imaginary friends are more useful than celebrities.